It’s Holly

so southern california’s on fire. like, for real this time. all hell’s broken loose. I’m just waiting for the locusts to come and eat up what ain’t been burned. that’s probably not a good thing to say, but it feels all apocolyptic up in here. i’m not in an imminant danger, but the smoke is hellacious and coming through the vents at work.

…on a lighter note.

i was watching MTV Cribs, and Aaron Carter was on there (he’s that backstreet boy’s little brother), showing his “compound” in Miami. So I’m watching, nothing unordinary for a little rich 15 year old white kid with 4 cars and no permit… whatever, i’m not bitter. Then I notice he has a doo-rag on under his baseball cap. So I’m thinkin to myself… why he got on a doo-rag? He can’t get no waves with that straight blonde hair! So I’m still watching… and i notice his shirt. This little white boy got on an airbrushed shirt of Tupac. Oh hell no. What the hell he know about Tupac? You know he paid $300 for that shirt in some boutique… I can get it at the swap meet for $10. Oh, he’s killin me. I guess I don’t mind Justin Timberlake “acting black” or whatever, ’cause the boy can sang and he got skills. But aaron mucka-pucka carter? oh hell no. that’s not gonna work. So I just wanted to let you know i’m on my way to miami to snatch that doo-rag off his head and jack his Tupac shirt. I’ll be back.

As per Scott’s request to post something new instead of reading all about Stephanie’s Crack, I’ve decided to post. It’s been crazy hectic lately. So sorry. Here’s the Holly update:

•Got the “Magic Tan” a couple weeks ago to help speed up the tanning process, and to give my clear legs some color. It worked well, except for my orange palms and by extraordinarily dark wrists.

•Work has been crazy crazy crazy. I wake up in the middle of the night trying to figure out solutions for clients. bastards.

•Psychic told me I’d meet a man near the end of this month. She’s cuttin’ it pretty close because I haven’t met anyone yet.

•My store is up. Visit and buy things. Ask me for samples, I’ll drive by your house and spray you.

•Still miss Jonathan.

•Jamaica’s been postponed until January. No big whoop – just more time to lose weight. Stephanie is going with me, thank the lord. I don’ tthink I could handle all the boys by myself.

•Dr. Atkins should be rolling over in his grave because I keep cheating on his diet. I have, however, made a few of the desserts and they’ve come out quite well. I’m also quite addicted to his ice cream… but damn him for small portion sizes.

•I have this crazy tendency to be uncontrollably attracted to gay men. I’m missing equipment, but I’m sure we could compromise (there are attachments we can buy!!!) A bad habit I’m trying to rid myself of… sorta like any type of empty processed carbs, I just can’t stay away. The gay ones are just so much nicer. lol

•I’ve spent weeks and weeks doing this online dating profile thing, and I’ve yet to meet someone. They tell you how many times your profile has been viewed (1389), and I keep getting e-mails from 50-something year old men. Do I need a sugar daddy? I don’t even eat the candy.

I think that’s about it. There’s more… but I’m not willing to tell you. I’ll try to post more, Scott… I promise.

literally. This girl is crazy, but I love her. This is the AIM conversation I have with her today.

Steph: Sorry, I had lunch.

Holly: It’s okay

Steph: Be right back, gotta poop.

Holly: lol! Damn Steph, that’s nasty!

Steph:Oh nevermind. False alarm…

Holly: Oh, that’s so much nastier. lolol

Steph: I don’t think they were ready to come out yet.

Holly: Oh, lord. lmao!

So, Jonathan and I went though his little sister’s room one day and we came across her “Man Rules”. I just recently rediscovered them. They are as follows:

-Taller than me (over 5’5″)
-smoke, or at least not be bothered by it
-can’t be overly religious, but I have no preference in beliefs
-no younger than 15 1/2
-assertive
-open-minded
-gets along well w/ many different people
-non-gay
-funny, but not in a dumb way
-if he can’t drive, he needs to be able to get rides really often
-non-judgemental
-really cute, but not to the point where tons of other girls really like him too
-not an angry drunk

I like the term “non-gay” instead of heterosexual. That was a nice twist. It looks to me that you’re looking for a well-rounded smoking lush with lot of friends with cars. A Frat boy. Laura… I love you, but I think you need Jesus.

1. What vehicle do you drive?
Chevy S-10, in what most people would call Brown, but I call “Deep Champagne”.

2. How long have you had it?
Since 2001, I got it brand new.

3. What is the coolest feature on your vehicle?
When you increase your speed, the volume automatically gets louder (to combat that noisy traffic noise), how cool is that? And when you have the radio on when you stop your car, as soon as you open the door the radio automatically turns off (how dope is that?). I just found out I have lumbar support (took me a while to figure out what that little knob on the side of my chair was for).

4. What is the most annoying thing about your vehicle?
It’s only 4 cylinders, so when I’m going up a hill or going on a freeway onramp, my car sounds like a dying dog – especially in the summer. I have to stratigically turn my air conditioning on and off depending on whether or not I’m going up a hill.

5. If money were no object, what vehicle would you be driving right now?
I’d be causing pollution along with the rest of the world in an H2 or Volvo SUV (I like to feel tall).