It’s Holly

So, in my unrelentless battle of the bulge, my kind sister suggested the comical idea of giving up foods that are Deep Fried. In turn, I told Kelly of my sister’s evil scheme, and here’s her Deep Fried rationalization:

“On consumption of Deep Fried goodness your stomach starts to shut down due to the massive amount of saturated fats, making it impossible to absorb any more food. You see the grease operates as a food barrier. It lines the stomach with a protective coating, if you will, so any calories/fat eaten after anything Deep Fried will simply go right through you. The grease is so slippery food just glides through your intestinal track with no time to actually digest. So in conclusion I feel, with the data I have gathered, that eating something Deep Fried isn’t bad for you, it is actually very beneficial.

It’s Deep Fried, bitches!!! It’s so good it’s capitalized. Need I say more. Tell Eartha she is crazy.” - Kelly, deep fried connoisseur and maîtresse de beurre

Can you see why me and this girl hang out?! She’s like… my white twin. lol Rationalize that shit, Eartha! bwahahahaha!!!!