It’s Holly

Y’all know I love to cook, right? My latest experiment was a recipe for savory whoopie pies. In this case – jalapeno corn bread whoopie pies with goat cheese bacon and scallion filling. Yes they were as delicious as they sound.

Original recipe, courtesy of Sing for your Supper below.

jalapeno cornbread batter, all mixed and spicy and happy

frying up the bacon. you're welcome.

cream cheese, goat cheese, bacon and scallions. and also winning.

finished cornbread. i couldn't wait.

et voila! c'est fini!

—
Jalapeño Cornbread Whoopie Pies
Makes about 10-12 pies

For the Cornbread:
1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup cornmeal
1/4 cup (packed) brown sugar
2 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
1 cup buttermilk, at room temperature
4 tablespoons unsalted butter , at room temperature
1 large egg, at room temperature
2 jalapeño chiles, seeded and finely chopped
Goat cheese filling (recipe follows)

Position a rack in the center of the oven and preheat the oven to 375 degrees. Line two baking sheets with parchment paper.
In a medium bowl, stir together the flour, cornmeal, brown sugar , baking powder, and salt. In the work bowl of a stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, beat together the buttermilk, butter, and egg on low speed until just combined. Increase the speed to medium and beat until thoroughly combined, about 3 minutes. Add the flour mixture and the chopped jalapeno to the batter and beat on low until just combined.
Using a spoon, drop about 2 tablespoons of batter onto one of the prepared baking sheets and repeat, spacing them at least 2 inches apart. Bake one sheet at a time for about 12 minutes each or until the cakes begin to brown around the edges. Remove from the oven and let the cakes cool in the pan for about 5 minutes before transferring them to a rack to cool completely.

To assemble: Spread filling onto the flat side of one cake using a knife or spoon. Top it with another cake, flat-side down. Repeat with the rest of the cakes and filling. You can also use a pastry bag with a round tip to pipe the filling onto the cakes, which will give you a smoother, neater presentation.

Goat Cheese, Bacon and Scallion Filling:
6 slices bacon
4 ounces soft fresh goat cheese, at room temperature
4 ounces cream cheese, at room temperature
2 tablespoons milk
1 tablespoon chopped fresh scallions

In a medium skillet, cook the bacon over medium heat until crisp. Using a slotted spoon, transfer to a paper-towel-lined plate to drain and cool. When cool, crumble into small pieces.
In the work bowl of a stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, beat together goat cheese, cream cheese and milk on low speed until just combined. Increase the speed to medium and beat until smooth and creamy, about 3 minutes. Add the crumbled bacon and the scallions and beat on low until combined.

Let’s just get right to it, shall we?

fresh potato chips + fresh onion rings: a fair staple. i highly recommend the bacon cheese sauce. the ranch, not so much. it tasted like they used miracle whip. narrsty.

oops. hee hee hee.

chocolate covered bacon. a little chewier than i thought it would be, but tasty nonetheless.

mexican funnel cake: a.k.a. “a flat churro”. i think this was one of the overall favorites of the day.

deep fried butter on churros: first of all, stop judging me. second of all, we didn’t finish it. that large log shaped item on the top of the pile of other deep fried pieces of dough is the deep fried butter. it looks so light and fluffy and unassuming. until you take a bite. the butter absorbs into the dough, so you don’t see it when you take a bite, but as you start chewing. sweet baby jesus, it’s like butter bursting in your mouth. we barely finished 1 between the four of us. if you’re curious, get it. but it wasn’t mind blowing or extra delicious by any means.

sweet potato corn dog: skip this. i don’t know if it was the oil they used to deep fry or what, but the sweet potatoes didn’t even taste like sweet potatoes, it just tasted like an oily sponge. boooo.

hash brown corn dog: i had high hopes for this, i really did, but skip it. same place as the sweet potato dog, same greazy ass oily spongy potato mess. boooooo.

steamed artichoke: with mayo and butter to dip! we felt like we had to get a vegetable in somewhere. here it is.

fresh grilled corn: ooh look, another vegetable! heather said this was delicious.

chicken wings: these were super tasty, and kind of surprised us all.

turkey legs: i kept seeing these EVERYWHERE, and we didn’t actually get one because we were so full. next time i’ll get one.

deep fried oreos: i think this was the surprise winner of the day. we all looked at each other like, why is this good? WHY IS THIS GOOD!??? it shouldn’t be good! but… it was good.

deep fried avocado: my personal favorite of the day. douse that shit in hot sauce and go awf.

soft pretzel: the final purchase of the day, and was quite tasty! i haven’t had a good soft pretzel in a long time.

so, there it is. all the food we ate. and we didn’t finish ONE THING. not one.

… but how awesome is my camera?

The baking bug has bitten again. Maybe it’s the cold weather. Maybe it’s because I like to bake. Maybe it’s because I finally cleaned my kitchen, but a clean kitchen just doesn’t look right so I decided to get it messy again. Maybe I just wanted some cupcakes.

picture courtesy of Migs Vuitton

This was definitely my best batch of Red Velvet Cupcakes. ever ever. Better than this batch. I started with a recipe from my favorite cupcake blog, Cupcake Bakeshop by Chokylit, with a few modifications of my own. See below.

Cupcakes
makes 36 cupcakes / 350 degree oven

3-3/4 cups cake flour
1/4 cups cocoa [I used closer to 3/4 cup]
1-1/2 teaspoons baking soda
1-1/2 teaspoons baking powder or 1/2 teaspoon cream of tarter [I used baking powder]
3/8 teaspoon salt
1-1/2 cups buttermilk
3 teaspoons vinegar [I used 3 tsp of coconut vinegar, because it's what i had on hand]
1-1/2 teaspoons vanilla
1/2 ounce red food coloring paste [I used a shit ton of liquid food coloring to offset the color of the additional cocoa i added in]
2-1/4 cups sugar
3/4 cups butter
3 eggs

I kept the frosting recipe the same –

Vanilla Bean Cream Cheese Frosting

12 ounces or 1-1/2 packages of Philly cream cheese
1/2 stick butter
4-5 cups sifted powdered sugar
seeds of 1/2 vanilla bean
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

The results? Fantasticalorgasmical. Yes, the best cupcakes ever. I brought them into work, and someone said “Are these from a box?”. I suppose that’s a compliment.. meaning they taste.. professional? lol

Also baked this week – German Chocolate Cupcakes. They were aiiight. I used cake flour instead of the recommended all-purpose flour because I thought it would be fancier. Turns out the crumb is too fine, and the cupcakes sort of just disintegrated on your tongue upon first bite, and didn’t really hold up or provide enough texture for the really thick frosting. But, that’s why we experiment, right? Right. More cuppycakes to come…

jonathan’s christmas present to me was taking me this restaurant i’ve been dying to go to.

so we went.

first:

[baby broccoli, pancetta, parmesan, soft egg, bread crumbs]
a great start to the night. the broccoli had a nice bite to it still, the crispy bits of pancetta were awesome. the egg made it for me, though. you know i’m an egg slut… such a sucker for a perfectly poached runny egg.

second:

[crispy hominy, lime]
think… individual kernels of corn, flash deep fried, seasoned with salt and a squeeze of lime on top. like, the best corn nuts you’ve ever had, ever. a little salty, but quite tasty.

third:

[pig ear, chili, lime, fried egg]
jonathan said it reminds him of that mexican candy lucas. it’s spicy and sour and salty and goodt. definitely the dish i was looking forward to the most, and it lived up to all the unrealistic expectations i set for it. the egg makes it.

fourth:

[ricotta & goat cheese gnocchi, bolognese]
some of the best gnocchi i’ve ever had. light, fluffy, melt-in-your-mouth cheesy goodness. the meat sauce was also delightful.

[Note: at this point, i'm seriously seriously full. jonathan tells me to shut the fuck up, and to not mention the F word again. i take another swig of wine and hunker down.]

fifth:

[barbeque pork belly sandwiches, slaw ]
oh. my. god.
srsly.
it’s a big ass piece of super flavorful pork belly. you can’t be mad at that. ever.

sixth:

[foie gras, biscuit, maple sausage gravy]
i don’t know who thought of this, but they deserve a grammy award cause this mess was music to my tummy. i’ve never had foie gras prepared this way (i’ve had it as pate / mousse, but that’s about it). kind of amazing, but i couldn’t imagine eating that entire serving by myself. it’s ridiculously rich foie gras topped with ridiculously rich gravy on top of the best biscuit ever. the biscuit alone was amazing, then you’re gonna top it with foie gras and gravy? genius, i say. genius.

seventh:

[quail fry, grits, chard, slab bacon, maple jus]
you deep fried a quail. straight up.
the chard was honestly my favorite thing on the plate, right next to the grits – which weren’t really grits. more like… melted cheese barely held together by grits. i was too full to actually enjoy this, but i think if i weren’t overly stuffed with foie gras it would have been the best thing ever.

eighth:

[tres leches, dulce de leche]
i seriously don’t even know why this happened. i’ll blame peer pressure from the waitstaff. the lady refilled our water and said “the tres leches is awesome”. the waiter came back with the dessert menu and said “i love the tres leches.” so, jonathan said “we’ll take the tres leches”. and yes, it was quite tasty. if i weren’t so ridiculously full, i probably would have devoured it. instead, jonathan did.

Overall, an amazing 2 1/2 hour dining experience. The staff was friendly and helpful with recommendations. The atmosphere was low-key, the wine was good, and the food was served hot (you know how i am about my hot food). i’d definitely go back, but next time we won’t order like, the entire menu. maybe. i make no promises.

thank you, jono! you won “who gave the better present” this year, which really, is a win for me.

I spent a ridiculous amount of time cleaning my apartment this weekend. And by cleaning I mean moving the mess from room to room, until it all ended up in my bedroom and then I got tired of cleaning (don’t worry, bedroom, I’ll get you tonight!). So, after the kitchen was near spotless, I decided it didn’t look right clean, so I got the itch to bake some cupcakes. What kind of cupcakes, you ask? Chocolate and Bacon cupcakes with Chocolate Buttermilk Frosting, of course! Here’s my handy work:

The consensus is they’re rich and delicious, but only 1 should be eaten if you don’t want to clog an artery. I don’t skimp on the bacon, or the frosting. When asked to describe these little treats, I say:

You like sweet & salty, right? Think of it like a chocolate covered pretzel, except it’s chocolate cupcake covered bacon.

A truer story has never been told. True story.

Not only do I truly appreciate any dish where bacon is added, I carry that appreciation over to the Innernets. And now, my online bacon obsession has come full circle with baconporn.tumblr.com/ and…

wait for it…

bacolicio.us

add bacon to any site you think could be helped by adding bacon (but really, that’s every site, right?)

i think i want to start an online petition to replace the ubiquitous “http://” with “http://baclicio.us/”. can I hack firefox so that my address bar always has “http://bacolicio.us” at the beginning?

OMG, bacon on bacon porn. http://bacolicio.us/http://baconporn.tumblr.com/

Dear Whole Foods,
I simultaneously love you and hate you.
Regards,
Holly

I went to Whole Foods after work last night to get a sandwich for dinner. $26 later, I left with a panini, two italian sodas and an ice cream sandwich.

How the fuck does that happen.

Last night’s tweet:

Let me just tell you… it was the best effin’ ice cream sandwich I’ve ever had. Ever. In this history of cookie and ice cream combinations that I’ve ever put in my mouth, this is, by far, the best. Ruby Jewel:

The cookie was still crunchy without being too hard. The ice cream was smooth and creamy. And it’s all organic and natural! Whole Foods is hit and miss sometimes. It’s super pretentious and bougie, but once in a while you find truly good stuff that’s worth being ridiculously overpriced. So go find one of these ice cream sammies. You’ll thank me hard.

sidenote
wtf is up with the lemon having fingers? someone’s lemon is missing a chromosome. fucking whole foods.

it’s so wrong, but so right.

yes, that is a mcdonalds french fry dipped in a mcdonalds sundae. if you’ve tried it, you know i’m speaking truth. if you’re looking at your monitor in disgust and wondering why we’re friends, then you obviously need to scoot on down to your local mcdonalds and give this mess a try. big ups to kaye for hookin’ a sista up.

don’t knock it ’til you try it.

In a concerted effort to save money, Mikee, Nat and I have decided to stop going out for lunch. The agreement is you gotta bring lunch, everyday, from home. If you forget your lunch or just decide you want to eat out, you get a tally mark next to your name on the whiteboard.

Whoever gets the most tallies has to buy a round of shots in Vegas next month. This morning I tweeted that I was at Starbucks, and when I came into work there was already a tally next to my name. It’s serious. I didn’t think Starbucks was tally worthy, I mean, that’s not a meal… it’s a drink! So Mikee kindly bent the rules and gave me half a tally (see above).

Week one, and so far Mikee’s in the lead for getting me drunk in Vegas. Yay Mikee!

It’s the best way to wake up ever. Ever, in the history of waking up.

WHAT: An alarm clock that wakes you up with the smell and sizzle of cooking bacon.

WHY: No one likes to wake up, especially by an alarm. This clock gently wakes you up with the mouthwatering aroma of bacon, just like waking up on a Sunday morning to the smell of Mom cooking breakfast. Unless you’re Jewish.

HOW: A frozen strip of bacon is placed in Wake n’ Bacon the night before. Because there is a 10 minute cooking time, the clock is set to go off 10 minutes before the desired waking time. Once the alarm goes off, the clock it sends a signal to a small speaker to generate the alarm sound. We hacked the clock so that the signal is re-routed by a microchip that in responds by sending a signal to a relay that throws the switch to power two halogen lamps that slow-cook the bacon in about 10 minutes.

Anyone that would like to buy or build me one of these definitely has my permission to do so. Thanks.